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Two boys were playing hockey on the pond on Boston Common, when one is attacked by a vicious Rottweiler. Thinking quickly, the other boy took his hockey stick and managed to wedge it down the dog's collar and twist, luckily breaking the dog's neck and stopping the attach.
A reporter who was strolling by sees the incident, and rushes over to interview the boy. "Young Bruins Fan Saves friend from Vicious Animal..." he starts writing in his notebook. "But, I'm not a Bruins Fan", the little hero replied. "Sorry, since we're in Boston, I just assumed you were", said the reporter and starts again. "Red Sox Fan Rescues Friend from Horrific attack..." he continues to write in his notebook. "I'm not a Red Sox fan either!" The boy said. "I assumed everyone in Boston was either a Bruins or Red Sox fan. So, what team do you root for? the reporter asked. "I'm a Yankees fan!" the child beamed. The reporter starts a new sheet in his notebook and writes:
"Little Bastard from New York Kills Beloved Family Pet"
"A-Rod's hands are so soft" - Derek Jeter